Fredericton Locals’ Penelope Stevens Talks to Oh, No Theodore! and Repartee

Oh No, Theodore and Repartee Interview – October 5th, 2012, at the Capital Complex in Fredericton – Penelope Stevens

These interviews are transcribed as closely to the actual events as possible. Please enjoy these somewhat grimy tales from some of the East Coast’s best emerging artists.

Oh No, Theodore! (Fredericton, NB)

Jake Spencer, Bassist of Oh No, Theodore! (JS): “…Aww i wish Luke was here, he told me the best story today.
Aaron Bravener, drummer of Oh No, Theodore! (AB): i could tell Luke’s story…
JS: about his hand?
AB: yeah.
JS: nooo noo noo, I don’t know.
AB: Whatever. Today Luke went up to Joy Kidd Residence up on campus, because we thought that we had left our merch bag there. So he grabs the don that works at Joy Kidd Residence and they go through like closets and stuff.
Penelope Stevens of FrederictonLocals (FL): To look for your merch bag?
AB: Yeah, because we had played Kiddstock last weekend, which was… fun.
AB: It was! it was cold, but it was fun.
FL: You were outside?
AB: Yeah, we were on a balcony, like overlooking a bunch of stuff, [Kiddstock] raises money for Habitat for Humanity, so they had a few bands, (…). And they had people who lived in the residence who would come and do like a few songs each. It was cool, it was like if you lived in the res and you played an instrument you could come and play like three songs. So while we were setting up, you could like play a song… it was cool, yeah. SO THAT’S WHY LUKE WAS ON CAMPUS.
So they’re digging through closets and Luke goes to open a closet door.
And he gets this sh*t on his hand, he doesn’t know what it is. And he looks and it’s jizz.
(laughs and murmurs)
He’s got somebody’s jizz on his hands, from just opening –
JS: — I don’t think it was jizz…
AB: Luke was pretty sure it was jizz.
JS: No, I think like somebody…
FL: — of course luke thought it was jizz.
Alethea Dinkins, violinist of Oh No, Theodore! (AD): No way.
AB: It’s Luke though.
JS: Yeah, he’s like “Oh man, i had jizz on my hand, it was horrible.”
AB: He was gagging telling me the story.
JS: No, this is my take on the story: He was walking around, he’s opening a door –
FL: — Oh, you think it was his jizz?
JS: …No.
JS: I feel as if somebody the night before or something, got drunk and walked past, and like spat and accidentally –
AB: That would have dried over night! spit would have dried!!
FL: Not if it was a loogy…
AD: I don’t know, that’s still disgusting, not as disgusting, but…
AB: Whatever it was, it was still on the door. that’s GROSS.
JS: Well, the even grosser part of the story is, if that is the case, and that’s what happened, then somebody would have had to like stand at a doorknob and just like…
FL: Well maybe they were in the closet doing it and…
JS: And he pulls out and is like “oh i’m just going to aim at the door –”
FL: No, maybe it was a mess, and he was going out to try to clean it off?
AB: Who knows?
JS: …Saw it as a target…
AB: I don’t know. university kids are weird.
FL: Especially if they live in res.
AB: Yeah, he’s like ‘Oh, this is going to be funny, watch it!’ and jerks off on a door handle.
JS: Or, there’s another side to the story: Somebody could have been, i don’t know, putting up wallpaper, and accidentally got some of the glue on the door handle.
AB: Highly unlikely.
AD: Come onnnn, Jake. This is a way better story.
AB: I like the jizz.
FL: Wallpaper. Come on, Jake. Wallpaper. In Res?
AB: What do the people want to hear? Do they want to hear about wallpaper or jizz?
AD: My question is: uhhhh, did we find the merch bag?
AB: The merch bag was at the Charlotte Street Arts Centre. not even close.”

Repartee (St. John’s, NL)

FL: The theme tonight appears to be semen. It would really tie this whole piece together, you know, if you could bring it back full circle.
Nick Coultas-Clarke, drummer of Repartee (NC): Oh, well we could talk about the pee boners…
Meg Warren, synth and lead vocalist of Repartee (MW): Oooooh, the pee boners. Right. Like when you get a boner and you can’t pee.
Robbie Brett, Guitarist of Repartee (RB): No, it’s actually quite different.
MW: that’s not a pee boner?
RB: no, it’s when you get a boner and then you have to pee!
RB: I could tell quite a good story about pee boners, really.
NC: go with the pee boner story?
MW: pee boner
FL: pee boner, it’s happening.
RB: okay the pee boner story, part 1.This is Robbie bret.
I had a problem with peeing up until the first time i ejaculated and found out what boners were for. It all started when I first got erections at the small age of
(various ages discussed)
RB: I don’t know. I know people who got them smaller, er,when they were smaller, or younger, or whatever, but I don’t know. Age unknown. however, when I got a boner, i thought the reason why was because i had to pee. So everytime i got a boner, I would go to the bathroom because I thought my dick was full.
(several laughs)
so i’d go to the washroom and i would like pee all over myself because my boner was like… yeah…
so to this day, i always sit down when i pee…
MW: no it’s true! whenever i go in after robbie, the toilet seat is always down.
RB: I sit down, i trained myself, because it was so many years.
and then uh, so…
FL: Are you ever going to break the habit, or…?
RB: No, it’s comfortable! i know why girls do it now.
(more laughs)
RB: I would sit down on the toilet, i would put the toilet seat down, obviously, and I would put my dick under the toilet seat to push it down when i had a boner, and i would pee and i would hope that it would get in the toilet, but then sometimes it would get in my pants and stuff like that, so i would have to change my underwear, then i started taking off my pants when i peed and stuff
and this was when you were… how old?
this was definitely like late elementary school, junior high, and stuff…
FL: …And that is why sexual education is so important.
RB: Yeah, but my guidance counsellor was the father of the drummer of the Trews. So all the time it was like “the Trews this, the Trews that, and how they were called One Eyed Trouser for a while. One Eyed Trouser… I guess that kinda ties in to the sexual theme or whatever.”
MW: The Trews, wait. So what you’re saying is that the dad of the Trews’ drummer didn’t tell you to do with your boner?
RB: Yeah, so I had to find out when I was in like Grade 11 or something, what boners were for. With the first girl that I had intercourse with. And I had no idea what was going on with my dick, I was like –
Aaron Bravener (Oh No, Theodore!): “I’m going to PEEEEEEE!!!!!”
RB: It was so bad because I would get a boner, and I would go pee and it would go away, then it would come back and I’m like “AGAIN? I just peed! like, why is this still here?” And I was like “I got a peeing problem.”
RB: And that’s how we became Repartee. It used to be ReparPee, but we changed it because Repartee is actually a word.

Also, Repartee has a 4-song EP that just came out and they are giving it away for FREE at this website. It’s called Hello, Hello, Hello, and it’s not as good as One direction (their words, not mine).
“We want to protect people’s ears. Bring ear muffs. Just come to our shows and look at our drummer. He’s gorgeous. Bring other music, probably some One Direction.” – Repartee

Comments are closed.